Helping Children with Autism Build Social Skills

People on the autism spectrum face several challenges, especially when it comes to social interactions. They may struggle with verbal and nonverbal communication, understanding social cues, empathy, and/or reciprocal social interactions. These challenges can make it difficult for those on the spectrum to establish meaningful, lasting relationships.

April is Autism Awareness Month, and it is the perfect time to highlight some ways we can help children with autism to face social challenges. At CW Psychological Services in King of Prussia, Pennsylvania, we have providers skilled in helping children and families navigate life on the spectrum.

We understand that trying to get your child with autism to interact with others successfully can be frustrating, but there are a variety of techniques that can help them develop social skills over time. Here are a few:

1.) Explore Social Skills Training

The first step to helping your child achieve social and relationship success is to educate yourself. We suggest you start with an evidence-based program called social skills training, or SST. This learning model is designed to help those on the spectrum to better understand how to interact with others.

One of the biggest challenges of those on the spectrum is learning to read nonverbal cues from others. SST can help your child recognize different expressions and emotions, so they can then learn how to respond appropriately. They will also learn about the importance of making eye contact when someone is talking to them and when that behavior is appropriate.

2.) Explain What is Socially-Acceptable

No child is born knowing appropriate social skills or manners. Most children learn by watching others, but those on the spectrum have a harder time interpreting what they see around them. Social cues and norms don’t come easy to those with autism. You can help them by explaining more clearly what is going on and what an appropriate response would be.

Visual aids, like videos and books, can also be a huge help. Some popular books include The New Social Story Book, My Social Stories Book, and The Social Skills Picture Book, among others.

3.) Reinforce Positive Behavior

Once you have provided a clear explanation to your child on what some appropriate social interactions may be, praise them for displaying those skills. Those with autism don’t want to be told they are doing things wrong because they like to do what is right. Any negative criticism can be upsetting and hurtful. So, rather than pointing out what they are doing wrong, cheer them on when they do the right thing.

For example, you might offer them a favorite treat, activity, or something else that appeals to them after a moment of successful interaction. These rewards will help to encourage the development of more positive behaviors.

4.) Practice Practice Practice

Social situations can be hard for everyone and it is impossible to predict what situations your child may face. You can help your child to be a little more prepared by practicing different scenarios and displaying positive interactions. By practicing at home, in their safe space, with someone they trust, they can feel more comfortable.

We suggest simulating various scenarios and walking them through them step-by-step. Once you have practiced with your child, consider inviting one or two friends over to practice in a safe space. You can also make a game of it, having you and your child take turns role-playing so they can better understand the importance of rules and taking turns.

5.) Be Patient

Remember that your child is not going to improve their social skills overnight. This process will take time and practice. Try to remain as patient and calm as possible, offering positive feedback whenever you can.

6.) Re-Evaluate Your Thinking

It can be easy to take for granted how natural social behaviors can feel to someone who is not neurodivergent. It is likely ingrained in you that it is rude when someone doesn’t make eye contact when talking to you, interrupts you when you are talking, or doesn’t use manners like "please" or "thank you." Remember that these things don’t come easy to those on the spectrum. These are things they may not learn on their own and they need your help.

Read our latest blog post for more.

Focus on What Matters

Working with a child or family member who is on the spectrum can be frustrating and challenging at times, but remember why you are doing it. Helping your child to be successful in social situations will help them to hopefully foster meaningful, fulfilling relationships in their future. Learning how to integrate themselves into our fast-paced world is challenging but ultimately can be so very rewarding.

Remember to take care of yourself during this process and lean on the many available resources. The counselors and therapists at CW Psychological Services are here for you and your family.

Ready to begin counseling in Pennsylvania?

Counselors and associate-level clinicians at CW Psychological Services are professionally trained. We have openings for online, or telehealth, therapy appointments. Email us at info@cwpsychologicalservices.com or call (610) 308-7575. We are here for you.